I remember, from childhood, the story of
Goldilocks and the Three Bears. Looking more closely at this fable, certain
things are clear. First, the three Bears take on anthropomorphic or human
qualities within a nuclear family. This means that there’s a distortion of
reality, and we are now talking about a fantasy world in which bears live in a
house that has table, 3 kitchen chairs, 3 bowls and utensils in the kitchen.
This house also had 3 other chairs in a different part of the house-the living
room. There was also a second floor with a bedroom that has three beds, apparently
in that single room. What a middle-class family with the basic amenities. Note,
it’s not a cabin in the woods, but a house in the forest.
The only emotions or feelings exhibited by this bear family were
anger and apparent fear and surprise. The father bear came across as expressing
only anger. He growled, suggesting anger on three separate occasions. The first
was when he noticed that someone took a bite out of his porridge. Was this
father hungry, angry that someone dear took a bite out of his food or angry
about the intrusion? How did he know that somebody sat in his chair and why
would that elicit anger? Was that chair his narcissistic possession, and an
expression of his authoritarian character? He also growled when he noticed that somebody
had been lying in his bed. Was the bedding messed up, and did this disturb this
compulsive bear’s lack of order and control. In essence, the theme and
characterization of the father bear was only that this bear was growing over
minimal circumstances. Are fathers generally angry is the message.
The mother bear, on the other hand, exhibited no emotion. It didn’t
matter whether someone ate her porridge, sat in her chair, or even slept in her
separate bed. She was certainly a noncontroversial figure and somewhat inconsequential
to the story. Perhaps she was the peacekeeper or the go-between. But based on
the story, she just told the facts and expressed that clearly or robotic
like. Are mothers without emotion and
follow their authoritarian and dominating husbands around without opinion? Or,
does this traditional mother figure stuff and repress emotions and not very 21st-century
like?
Now for the baby bear. The baby bear consistently cried, perhaps
from anxiety or fear or even hunger as in the case of not having any food. This
baby bear also cried pointing out that its chair was broken. We don’t know the
sex of that baby bear so whether or not crying was appropriate and/or the
result of the controlling “parenting” of the father bear. Single children
certainly do not like to share when they are the center of attention-was that
crying just attention seeking? This baby bear exhibited immature crying
behavior. However, the baby bear exclaimed-either surprise or anxiety when
finding Goldilocks in its bed.
Goldilocks, on the other hand, exhibited intrusive and criminal like
behavior by entering a house with apparently no one there. She just walked
right in. She was also self-centered and narcissistic, and likely got her way
because one porridge bowl was too hot while the second porridge ball was too
cold. She didn’t cool off the first porridge bowl or heat the second porridge
bowl. She devoured and ate up the third bowl exhibiting a feeling of being
happy. It is apparent that her conscience had no limits. She was not thinking
that she was doing anything incorrect. Hungry Goldilocks simply enjoyed eating
someone else’s food. She was just meeting her own selfish, egocentric and
hunger needs.
Being hungry, she went into the living room to sit down. This time
she exhibited the emotion of “exclaimed”-maybe irritation or annoyance, along
with whining about the second chair. She didn’t like the fit in the first two
chairs and simply liked, with a sigh, the third chair. However, it didn’t
bother her when she broke the chair. She made no effort to fix it or make
amends. Once again responsible behavior was not exhibited while sitting in the
chairs. While going upstairs to the bedroom and lying down in the three beds,
she expressed no emotion whatsoever. Goldilocks just went to sleep. However,
when she woke up, she was frightened by screaming help and was now the victim.
She was a perpetrator in the story and now she becomes the victim. She ran out
of the room, ran down the stairs and ran away into the forest. Appropriately,
she never returned or broke into that home again.
Some of the messages and ideas that I learned at an early age from
this fable were as follows: 1. Father types or authority figures are angry and
displeased when things are not compulsively in order. It’s easy to angrily
upset this cold human type. They don’t think, they just react angrily when
things don’t go their way. They want to be in control at all times. They are
scary figures.
2. Mother types are
subservient and passive in the household hierarchy. They are in second place
and follow the father type. They also do not express emotion and simply repress
their feelings. As a result, we don’t know what they’re thinking or feeling. We
don’t have a clue with their robotic like responses. We don’t know what bothers
them-could it be intrusion, eating one’s food, sitting in one’s chair, sleeping
in one’s bed or even witnessing a baby’s chair broken?
3. All babies do is cry. They
cry about eaten food, having a broken chair-the baby is the victim in this
story. Babies can be taken advantage of, because all they do is cry as opposed
to saying what’s bothering them.
4. A white human female
disrespects someone below their station in life. They can take advantage and
enter any house they want, eat someone’s food, sit in anyone’s chair-even break
it and sleep in anyone’s bed. It doesn’t matter. This privileged white female
has no obligation other than to dominate and take advantage of the situation.
However, when confronted, she becomes the victim. In essence, the perpetrator
takes advantage and then becomes victimized in the process. Poor me, help me
forget that I am the perpetrator.
This in human fable fantasy or illusion taught me a lot and what I
learned is not to repeat it to anyone other than to make a point of its
unhealthiness.
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