Friday, November 27, 2020

 Old, Are you kidding?

 

Last week during one of my 10 mile trail runs, I stopped and talked with Chris. Chris was a long-distance runner for Sac State; a ride and tie champion; a sub 24 hour Western States competitor; my trainer and friend for my Western States run; a ride and tie and running partner. Chris asked me if I was going to run 81 miles during my birthday week. I told him, that I’m using Tony, my running partner friend, as an excuse. For most of the year Tony has been on Whidbey Island building a second home and is still there. If you want a motorcycle or kayak built or a computer or printer serviced, a running or pacing partner, or want to know where to get ice cream, Tony’s the “stud muffin.”  Tony also has completed the Tevis 10 times. This disquisition has to do with old, aging and character.

After that meeting with Chris, I thought more about my tradition of running the same number of miles per week as my age. I had an epiphany. Why not run 10 miles for six more days? Doing so, would give me 70 miles for that week.  I did just that. With more thought, I came up with the brilliant idea of using 70 as a base and then I would subtract 1 mile each year. So in 2021, I would run 69 miles in that week and so forth. By implementing this original proposal, did this mean I’m getting old? No, I’m going to differentiate between “aging” and “old.”

At one time in our history, “old” was a condition independent of years. In fact there was value in having a special category not related to aging or death. Notably, old was both an endless and ageless character. Old masters paintings and old manuscripts are viewed as illustrations that have nothing to do with dying but instead lasting. Paleontology, archaeology and geology are studies of the old. Also, the word “old” was defined as something fully nourished, grown-up and matured. Benefits of old included trustworthiness, venerability, proverbially, and value. In the poem “Beowulf,” oldness was related to virtues of nobility, mercy, esteem and power. However later, Shakespeare used old as an instrument of insult and ridicule. His examples were “old and foul,” “old and wicked,” “old and miserable,” and “old and deformed”. Since Shakespeare, the word old has negative connotations.

Why not change, reframe and return to the previous meanings of old. For instance, I like my old and comfortable shoes, my old friends - Beverly, Rita, Lorna, Gail, Ferris, Dave, Maylon, Emmett, Rick, songs like Laura Nyro’s “Eli’s Comin” and ” Silhouettes” by the Rays ,  movies like “On The Waterfront,” visiting the British Museum, the Louvre, pyramids in Cancun, Roman Coliseum, visiting Thomas Jefferson’s home in Monticello, visiting Salem Witch Village in Massachusetts, visiting Anne Frank’s home in Denmark going through checkpoint Charlie  in order to eat in East Berlin, and novels like Ernest Hemingway’s “Old Man and the Sea,” and reading history books. I like history and that would’ve been my second major. Old can be, with the importance of long term memory, a life review of imagination that brings to life the wonders of all those long-lasting, informative, special and exciting relevant emotional events. It’s the power of imagination that deepens the integrity of character.

Unfortunately our society has discredited old and aging in our capitalistic process. It’s now about youth, new and beauty. Becoming old in our society is not valued at all. For example, the following has become reality: 1. the enormous number of nonscientific supplements available at health food stores 2. Numerous nonscientific creams, salves and lotions for skincare 3. A lot of products to improve hair, hair color and to grow hair 4. Cosmetic surgery to reduce and increase breast size and shape 5. Botox and other surgeries for changing body shape 6. Many fitness centers and home products like Peloton and NordicTrack 7. Many apps and personal trainers 8. Many diet and losing weight programs 9. Many books, information and apps to increase aging, compensating for HGH, estrogen and progesterone, testosterone, antiaging tips, increasing telomeres etc. 10. Many College classes and TV programs on Well-Being.

Despite the propaganda and irrespective of this multi-billion dollar industry, we have the following facts: 1. Greater proportion of older individuals that have illness and death due to Covid-19 2. Three quarters of the population are either overweight and/or obese 3. Physical illnesses on the rise like cancer, arteriosclerosis, hypertension, heart disease, osteoporosis, depression etc. 4. Decrease in life span rates 5. Increase in convalescent centers, retirement communities, home healthcare, reverse mortgage and other insurance programs.  Something is definitely not right and amiss.

I have data to support healthy aging. In my book “It Has Nothing To Do With Age,” I interviewed athletic individuals 65 years of age and older that were still competing in extreme sports. Yes, they were not as strong, as fast, as youthful as they were in their past. However, they were involved in a personal activity that provided a sense of mastery, achievement, recognition, meaning and pleasure as well as pain. In other words, they had fire in their belly that fueled their ability to compete at extraordinary levels.  It’s simply about their character. Character doesn’t diminish, it’s only the physiology in the body that changes. Character is key.

Yes, skin sags, eyesight fails, memory plays tricks, hair turns color, physical strength changes, over use injury surfaces, and running speed slows along with other cell death physiological differences. But what doesn’t change is my character, passion, motivation and attitude about running. I continue to enjoy being outdoors with my thoughts while being with nature. I look forward to running again with Tony when he returns from Whidbey Island.

We can learn much from Greek mythology regarding the process of aging. However, our beliefs, attitudes, and in some cases wisdom seems to be set. Our good and bad behaviors seem to become more cemented with age. We tend to repeat what we think and what we do over and over. In other words, despite the physical shape of our body, the strength of good and bad character seems intact.

According to Aristotle, the body is governed by its form, the psyche by the character of the psyche. It has no cause other than itself in it  fills itself by doing what it is naturally suited to do, which is also its pleasure. It’s been stated that old women gain their power by living long. In Socrates “The Republic,” Cephalus concluded “the doleful literary of all the miseries which they blame old-age…, there is just one cause, not old-age but the character of the man.” In Cicero’s De Senec-tute, “old men are morose, troubled, fretful and hard to please;… Some of them are misers too.  However these are faults of character not of age.”   Spinoza’s definition of essence “the endeavor to persist in its own being.”

From Greek mythology, we find an acting out of human affairs dramatizing struggles in the life process. Hercules was an archetypal hero with a willful image of aging. He had many hand-to-hand struggles with death [Thanatos] and with Hades the god of the underworld. Muscled Hercules had these terrific confrontations throughout his life symbolizing unparalleled strength. He never aged. However, his curse was that he became insane. Geras was a bald bent emancipated figure with pendant and reversed genitals. You could see him leaning upon a thin crooked stick while Hercules holds a huge studded club. However we find this personified figure in geriatrics, gerontology which is the study of old age. Tithonos was a human whose wish was granted of living forever. However, he neglected to specify at his present youthful age so he was cursed to live on and on forever growing older. Sisyphus, was punished by Zeus for eternity with pushing a rock up the hill. Once Sisyphus reached the hill top, the rock rolled back down again for another do over.  Symbolizing the persistent struggle in life against the absurdity of life or the repetition of irrational behavior is obvious to all. Sisyphus persisted in his own being as defined by his character. Socrates stated “To know thyself is the beginning of wisdom.”

When I was in private psychotherapy practice, I met a number of individuals looking for assistance in knowing thyself. Unfortunately, it’s very difficult to change attitudes, beliefs, irrational thinking and self-defeating behavior let alone the emotions connected with various conflicts. With a lifetime of non-logical thinking and poor decision-making, it’s easy to find an external source or scapegoat for blame for one’s psychological and/or emotional state of being. As a result, knowing thyself and making a positive and continuous change was very difficult. I agree with Spinoza “the endeavor to persist in its own being.”

Yes, I am aging and have experienced many physiological changes over the past 8 decades. But I am not old. However, I continue to look forward, have motivation and drive to achieve, think objectively, employ wisdom, avoid self-defeating behaviors, nourish significant interpersonal relationships and continue to laugh at myself. Do I have to run 81 miles this year, 82 miles the next year etc. in a week? No, but running provides meaning, a sense of accomplishment, and good physical health which reinforces and fuels my passion which encompasses my character. Remember, reframe old, and acknowledge aging with lasting character.

Reference

Hillman, James.  The Force of Character and the Lasting life. Random House 1999

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